Motherhood Realization

It's 3:17 in the morning, Lil' D and I are once again having our ritual crack of dawn bonding sessions. As she is sucking the life out of me (joking) I am thinking about all the things I will have to give up and sacrifice in order to maximize her life. There goes weekly mani/pedis for that immersion Chinese nursery school and monthly spa days for ballet practice. It's going to be rough on a sista's appearance, but as I gazed into her little unfocused eyes I know beyond a doubt this little one is my motivation now and forever.


I love being a mother...I am more aware. I feel things on a deeper level. I have a kind of understanding about my body, about being a woman. ~ Shelley Long

 

Taken by O2Weddings Photography~ Lil' D's first professional shoot 

New Realizations

 

  1. I now know I can do almost anything with one hand-- Wishing my Nigerian sister was in the states to teach me how to "Back" my baby.
  2. Seeing Lil' D's smile has been the highlight of my day for the past 26 days.
  3. I spend about 16 hours with her a day. When Big D wants to hold her once he gets home from work I sometimes feel like I want her only to myself. #selfishmuch
  4.  Breastfeeding isn't so bad. Pumping is though! #sorenessmuch
  5. I will try to talk myself out of spending all my disposable income on this little one's wardrobe.
  6. Coupons and discount codes are now a way of life.
  7. I feel this pressure to make sure every aspect of her life is near perfect as possible.
  8. I have to let go of the negative feelings, thoughts and energy. It's impossible to control fate, so I need to let go and relax.
  9. I need to start wearing a girdle. Stat!
  10. Being a Mommy is the best job in the world. After labour pains and a gassy baby, motherhood is sooo worth it.

 

 

 

 

Breastfeeding on Demand

Lil' D's pediatrician says feed her every two hours. My instinct is to feed her when she gives me the cues that she is hungry. These cues often happen more than once in a hour, but most times every 1.5 hours.

Breastfeeding on demand—-also known as feeding “on cue” and “baby-led” feeding—-is about responding flexibly to your baby’s hunger cues. It means initiating feedings when the baby requests them, and continuing each feeding session until the baby is satisfied. Source

 Breast milk production is keyed to the frequency of suckling. The more a baby nurses, the more milk a breast produces. If a baby suckles less frequently, milk production slows. For this reason, breastfeeding on demand is the ideal way to keep a mother’s milk production in sync with her baby’s needs. Source

For more of the scientific evidence for breastfeeding on demand click here.

 Learned this the hard way:

Just as importantly, full breasts may interfere with the quality of your milk supply. When breasts are full, the milk that comes out is low-fat “foremilk.” Only when breasts are soft—more empty—do breasts start to produce the higher-fat hind milk. Babies presented with full breasts may fill up on low-fat milk, which can cause colic and gastric problems (Woolridge 1995). Such babies may also have to feed more frequently to get enough calories. Source

 

Nightime feeding have been the toughest for me. Prior to Lil' D's arrival I read somewhere that co-sleeping was the best way to maximize your sleep when feeding on demand. Well from day one of me being a Mommy, Lil' D' and I have slept in the same bed. I've even learned to nurse lying down {the best position ever @ 4 in the morning}. Its been almost 3 weeks and I feel like I've gotten this breastfeeding thing down. I often think that the purchase of a crib was a waste. The idea of her being in a different room than me puts me on edge. Maybe when she is sleeping through the night or when I return to work I may feel differently. 

 

My MIL and parents don't agree with co-sleeping or picking Lil' D up as soon as she cries. Well 'Rents its called "proximal care" and it works for me. Proximal care is the practice of holding your infant at least 80% of the time between 8am and 8pm, breastfeeding relatively frequently, and responding rapidly to infant cries. Many (but not all) of parents who practice this care also practice co-sleeping.

 

All-in-all my first 17  days of motherhood have been great! I got over the major aches and pain of labour after a week. There is still an occasional Braxton Hicks-like contraction and back pain when bending over to long {esp. when changing diapers}. My belly looks and feels like a deflated balloon. Next week when I purshase the stroller I will begin to excercise. I feel like a caged tiger because of the pediatrician's imposed "House Arrest" for two months. I never thought I would get such joy from getting in the car and going to fill  up my gas tank or going to the drive-up mailboxes at the post office. I sometimes feel like this experience is part of a 12 Step program and I just have to take one day at a time.

 

 

My Pregnancy Weight Gain

 

149 lbs. ---> 18 Weeks 

152 lbs. ---> 22 Weeks 

158 lbs. ---> 26 Weeks 

158 lbs. ---> 28 Weeks 

160 lbs. ---> 30 Weeks 6 Days

166 lbs. ---> 34 Weeks 5 Days

168 lbs. ---> 36 Weeks 5 Day

168 lbs. ---> 38 Weeks 1 Day  {Estimated baby size 5.9 - 6.5 lbs.}

 

 

The Lie of the EDD

In my trusty birth resources binder, prepared for us by our Doula Lynn, I arrived on an article titled, "The Lie of the EDD: Why Your Due Date Isn't when You Think". It was an interesting read. As you may have guessed from the title the article deals with the common misconception that a full term pregnancy is a max of 40 weeks based on Naegele's Rule.

Here are a few tidbits from the article:

 

"There is one glaring flaw in Naegele's rule. Strictly speaking, a lunar month is actually 29.53 days, which makes 10 lunar months roughly 295 days, a full 15 days longer than the 280 days gestation we've been lead to believe is average. In fact, if left alone, 50-80% of mothers will gestate beyond 40 weeks."

 

"They found that for first time mothers (nulliparas) pregnancy lasted an average of 288 days (41 weeks 1 day). . . . To easily calculate this EDD formula, a nullipara would take the LMP, subrtract 3 months, then add 15 days." 

 

According to this calculation my EDD could be April 2, 2011 instead of March 25, 2011 . . .Yikes!!

 

"One of the most vital pieces of information to know when you are expecting is that ACOG itself does not recommend interfering with a normal pregnancy before 42 completed weeks."

Birth Announcements for Baby Cruz

My ESTIMATED due date is soon upon us and its time for me to think about birth announcements. I definitely want something letterpressed, with calligraphy, and a picture of Baby Cruz. A bit much you say, oh well I'm a stationery junky and these announcements must be all that and a bag of chips. Hey they are the formal introduction of our little prince/princess to the world.

 

{From IJORERE The Invitation Inc.}

{From IJORERE The Invitation Inc.}

{Forgot Source}

{From I forgot source}

 {From Sugar Paper}

 

Maternity Pin Up Boudoir with Glamour Bitch Photography

Yesterday my little sister and I ventured to parts unknown in southern New Jersey to have Dawn Doughtery of Glamour Bitch Photography take maternity pictures of me. Yesterday I was 35 weeks and 5 days preggo and besides having "cankles" I feel like my pictures looked amazing!! Thank you Dawn and Shannon (Super amazing makeup + hair artist) for making me feel beautiful, comfortable, and sexy so far along in my pregnancy. You ROCK!

My family and hubbie are going to be mad and call me an exhibitionist for posting this but hey I love my pictures they are sooo good I had to share. I'll deal with the repercussions later. Here is one of my shots.

New Generation of Cloth Diapers

About two years before we tried to conceive I made the decision to live a greener life and reduce my carbon footprint. I purchase almost all organic groceries (for a high ass weekly grocery bill), I try to purchase mostly products packaged and made with recycled materials, and I just stopped being so wasteful. Being green has also extended to my personal hygiene. I use less chemical in my beauty products like my deodorant, tooth paste, hair care products, etc. I stopped relaxing my hair a little over two years ago and it feels great to do without the creamy crack. As I begin to spend my life savings on baby products I've looked for companies and products that share my desire to be more eco-friendly.

I've been grappling using disposable diapers. To me its like drinking bottle water, its convenient but sooo bad for the earth. Well my research lend me to my latest purchase, gDiapers, a wonderful hybrid diapering product.

gDiapers flushable diaper refills are designed to keep your baby dry and happy. Because they are plastic-free, you can flush, compost or even toss them. gDiapers flushable diaper refills are made of sustainably farmed wood fluff pulp, sodium polyacrylate (SAP) for absorbency, and cellulose rayon. No plastic. 

 


 

 

Baby Cruz's Baby Shower -Long

On January 8, 2011, my sister and Bestie Richard hosted my baby shower at the Toro Loco Mexican Restaurant in South Orange, New Jersey. We had a blast! There was excellent food and company! Thanks to my other sister and Dad we got amazing photo coverage of the event as well.

As I reflect on my baby shower pics I am filled with happiness and an over abundance of joy because I am one of the chosen to know unconditional love and support. Thank you family and friends for contributing to my happiness (even those that were unable to attend)! Happiness definitely comes from appreciating and recognizing what you do have. I feel loved, cared for, and pampered--a wonderful place to be especially when you're 7.5 months preggo.

Recap:

 

  • I searched everywhere for the perfect cupcake topper. In the beginning, I thought able purchasing fondant toppers, but decided against it at the last minute.  I discovered these (24 for $6.49) and was sold!
  • My Bestie and sister contacted several bakeries to get a nice baby shower cake and in general the minimum price for a cake for 50 was $200. I told them that was too much and decided to take my chances with the Super Walmart. I ordered our cake and cupcakes from them. The cake fed 60 and was only $49 and the cupcakes were half dozen for $6. The picture above is the actual wedding cake that I used as inspiration and asked them to create it in my shower colors. I was completely satisfied! The cake was chocolate with fudge filling and it was GOOOODDD. The cupcakes were vanilla.
  • I assembled cymbidium orchid centerpieces the night before the shower and had to fight my cat to stop her from drink the water in the vases. SMH... Before going to work Friday, I went to the flower district (W. 28th Street, NYC) and purchased two stems of cymbidiums for $40.
  • On Ebay  I found a button-maker vendor and purchased 25 bilingual identity buttons- they were a big hit.
  • I purchased cards from a vendor on Zazzle (my favorite stationery site) and had Tiffany Stith of A Fine Line, LLC calligraphy the cards with purple ink for the candy buffet. Sorry to say the cards arrived the Monday after the shower :(

 Decor Detail Pictures

 

 


Party Pictures

 

Getting outfitted

 Richard's dramatic reading of the cards. LOL . . .

Aunts and Uncles - minus one {Tio Jason}

 For more pictures visit my Facebook gallery here.

High Boy Dresser ReDo

On Christmas morning I got the urge to resurface the high boy dresser I inherited for Baby Cruz. Let me give you some background. In many families one-of-a-kind jewelry or real estate is past down through from generation to generation. Well in my family it's antique furniture. I have inherited many unique antique pieces that have enhanced the traditional decor of my home. One such piece is a high boy dresser that was my Aunt's (now my aunt is in her sixties- she had this dresser as a teenager). The dresser was given to my mother for my little sisters' room and my mom saved it for me. The dresser is the perfect addition to Baby Cruz's nursery because the curved lines of the dresser complement our Bratt Decor crib.

The French Drexel Touraine dresser's original color was a creamy ivory/bisque color with greenish trim, all the original brass hardware is intact. The Cabriole legs and scroll feet are what I love the most. As you can see one of my younger sisters decided to place stickers on the dresser to "enhance" its aesthetic value. Well these damn stickers were hard as hell to get off. I did the wrong thing and used the end of a pair of scissors to scrap it off. Of course it left hideous scratch marks on the surface of several of the draws. 

Instead of using regular paint I decided the job would be easier to use spray paint. I went to the Home Depot and purchased the cheapest spray paint and primer they sold.

Before priming the wood I removed the hardware and hand-sanded the entire surface of the dresser. It was a tedious job I tell you. I wore a mask to cover my mouth and nose because being 7 months pregnant I didn't want to inhale any dusk and toxins. After one coat of primer the drawers looked like this:

The trunk of the dresser I didn't get a before picture, but here it is after I primed and painted it.

With just primer:

Here are the draws after primer and paint:

And now for the finished product ...drum roll please...

Yes I know the scraping of the stickers is very noticeable, but I'm satisfied with the finish product. On to the next project . . .

 

 

Azabache Bracelets

Growing up in a West Indian influenced household I remember hearing numerous folklores and sayings about superstitions and such. My husband experienced the same, but I believe more than me because he lived in Puerto Rico for a part of his childhood. Santería and Obeah magic were common place in our lives so when my wonderful coworker, Alex, who is of Cuban and Puerto Rican ancestry gifted Baby Cruz a beautiful gold Azabache Bracelet with a monogrammed name plate we were not surprised. 


 In Latin America, Azabache Bracelets are worn to protect against the Mal de ojo, or evil eye. The evil eye is believed to result of excessive admiration or envious looks by others. Having newborn babies wear an azabache (a gold bracelet or necklace with a black or red coral charm in the form of a fist), is believed to protect them from the evil eye.

 

The evil eye is a folk belief that the envy elicited by the good luck of fortunate people may result in their misfortune, whether it is envy of material possessions including livestock, or of beauty, health, or offspring.

 

Baby Cruz will be covered in the banishment of  evil spirits department. Now if only I could find a stroller.

African America Baby Shower Invites

I love, love, love Sweet Berry Lane's African-American inspired stationery line. Check out their company blurb:

Sweet Berry Lane originally started out as Sweet Spot Invitations (now closed) back in 2005. We sold general stationery and invitations, but only had a small selection of invitations featuring African Americans. While I was taking small steps at trying to solve the problem of the lack of African American stationery, it just wasn't enough.

I decided to take a big leap of faith and create Sweet Berry Lane, a site dedicated to creating quality stationery for African American consumers. Here, you will not just find one or two items featuring African Americans, but in the coming months, you will have hundreds of invitations to choose from.

We sell our own line of invitations, designed exclusively for Sweet Berry Lane, as well as invitations from some of the leading manufacturers of African American stationery products.

We look forward to serving you with all your stationery needs.

Thanks, 
Yolanda I Jones 
Owner 
Sweet Berry Lane

African American Mom to Be Blue and Chic

a chic mom-to-be with a green background The green background continues on the back of the card. Ideal for African American Baby Shower Invitations -Girl, Boy or Gender Neutral. $2.25 each

Jade African American Baby Shower Pink

This African American Baby Shower invitation features a beautiful mom to be with pink background. $1.95

 

Designing my Baby Shower

My baby shower is in several days and I am in the process of creating decor elements for our baby's first celebration.

"Baby Cruz" Candy Buffet Sign

On a trip to Walmart's craft section I picked up these wooden letters to paint and bling-out with 

 
70%

next we have lamp shades covered with carnation picks for the candy buffet

My centerpiece inspiration

Housekeeping Rant

Lately I've been feeling bad (mentally) because of the condition of my house. Both my brother-in-laws came to visit and basically said the same thing. One said, "Wow it looks like you guys just moved in." The other said, "Ummm okay Nida I don't want to step on anything soooo where should I put this." I laugh out loud when I hear remarks about my house keeping - it's been going on since we moved in this house some six years. I never really felt bashful about it until now. I blame it on my pregnancy and the surge in hormones. Typically I arrive home from work at about 4:45 p.m. and all I want to do is lie down and relax- which is what I do. At about 6:30 p.m. I'll get up to prepare dinner- I cook 3-4 days a week. By 8:00 p.m. I'm exhausted and prepare for bed.

Prior to being pregnant my routine was the same, except I was working two jobs so I was much more worn out. I have had conversations with my sisters, mother, mother-in-law, and husband about my lack of tidiness and they just don't seem to understand. My mother's favorite line is "what will you do when the baby arrives?" Well suh after waking at the crack of dawn to prepare for work in another state (NJ to NYC) I just don't have the wherewithal to clean house. Vacuuming and dusting please! I know they are necessary evils, but every week?! The same goes for washing clothes. I'm terrible I can go without washing clothes for a month- yes quite trifling! I'm used to buying new clothes instead of washing the dirty ones. 

 

As I told my brother-in-law, if I didn't work then you should be worried because then I would just be a shiftless you-know-what.  So let me paint a picture for you so you don't think I'm living in a pigsty. My bathrooms and kitchen remain spotless because they are the breeding place for bacteria and germs. Every other room in my house is littered with books (romance novels), stacks of paper (my research), and clothes (clean- because I wash and leave them in the laundry bag). Nothing really has its proper place, so a big pile on the floor is perfect. : ) Its funny when my husband complains about my stacks of books and papers I tell him to hire a maid. Of course he refuses so the problem persists. What's a girl to do?!*

 

Enough about my lack of house keeping. My brother-in-law volunteered to paint Baby Cruz's nursery, so today he and I went to Home Depot and purchased $160 worth of painting supplies for him to complete the job. Because we won't know the sex of our baby until he/she arrives in March I decided to paint the room in a neutral grey color- Winter's Day to be exact. See below.

On the wall:

 

Martha Stewart Living Paint 1-Gallon Semigloss Interior Paint ~$27.97 per gal

LaLa Shoes

Etsy merchant, Lala! makes playful and healthy soft sole shoes for babies and toddlers. 

"I just have a few rules - I work only with 100% wool felt ★ (all Oeko-Tex Standard 100 certified), 100% linen and other natural materials, I want my shoes to be functional, comfortable & healthy and I want them to look fabulous! In other words, I want to put all my efforts in something I believe in, I'll be proud of and which I enjoy to do."

Most of the baby shoes are available in a variety of sizes - there are 2 separate listings for baby and toddler sizes of the same model.


• in SMALL size listings you can choose between 3-4 baby sizes
• in MEDIUM size listings you can choose between 3-4 toddler sizes

SMALL and MEDIUM listings are different in sizes, thickness of the insoles and price. All MEDIUM sizes also have non-skid eco-leather outsoles. There is a detailed SIZE CHART in each listing to help you choose the right LaLa! Shoes size.

• high quality 100% wool felt (all Oeko-Tex Standard 100 certified)
• fasteners: non-skid eco-leather ribbons
• no glued parts

 

Check out my favorite!

Pip Yellow & Orange Booties

$32.00 + $6.50 shipping

Pixie Green Booties

 $38.00 + $6.50

 Runny Turquoise Booties

$36.00 + $6.50

 

Pepe Blue Booties

$43.00 + $6.50 shipping

Vert Orange Ballet Style

$42.00 + $6.50 shipping

Zen Mini Ballet Flats

$45.00 + $6.50 shipping

➜ Materials:
-------------------
• 100% linen
• insoles: 100% linen and 100% cotton flannel
• outsoles - thick herringbone natural colour linen
• no glued parts

Getting Ready for Baby Show

A couple of weeks ago I received a postcard in the mail inviting my husband and I to a "Getting Ready for Baby Show" at the Parsippany Sheraton (which is very nice btw). The invitation didn't offer much information like who was sponsoring the show or what specifically would be covered, but they provided a toll-free number if you wanted more information- I didn't bother to call. So Sunday morning D and I made the short drive to Parsippany to see what we could learn about getting ready for Baby Cruz. D and I arrived to find the "workshop" was in one of the Hospitality Suites of the hotel with about 15 other people anxiously waiting to see what this was about. To make a long story short, the safety "workshop" was actually a well constructed sales pitch for the Babee Tenda company. I was not as bothered as some of the folks in the room were, I took it for what it was a chance to gain insight to a new baby product. So below is a recap of the "seminar":

The Baby Carrier, The ExerSaucer, + The Swing

He began his presentation by informing his captive audience that as parents-to-be we must select and purchase products with a proven track record of greater than 6 years. Next he went on to express his grave concerns with Evenflo's ExerSaucer, the Baby Bjorn style carriers, and baby swings.

 

He illustrated with a doll how these products may lead to poor posture, a broken femur, and a host of other issues. {See "Injuries Associated with Infant Walkers," American Academy of Pediatrics and "Baby Walkers"}. 

The presenter stated the best alternative for these products- which people purchase to keep children "safe", stationary, and engaged- is to purchase a sling. A sling does not allow the baby to hang and it simulates a womb-like experience. He suggested looking for one without any plastic adjustments. Having no adjustments is best.

 The Car Seat

The presenter/salesman gave invaluable advice on purchasing a car seat. Simply put he said your car seat must have a slot to hook/loop the seatbelt through the actual car seat and not just the base. He also said don't use the carrier handle as you walk with the car seat because it is known to shift positions- carry the car seat in both hands if it needs to be transported with baby in it.

The Crib

The presenter made a profound statement to begin his discussion on cribs. He said, "there are more fatalities in unrecalled cribs than not" and cribs are the most deathly nursery product. When consumers shop for cribs they are often searching for the most aesthetically pleasing crib and not thinking about its safety factors. He reminded us that since a large percent of the crib manufacturers have factories in Asia that mass produce their products, the use of materials like steel and glue-nail construction are replaced with dreaded plastic and even lead filled finishes. Cheaper materials results in untimely infant deaths and injuries.

This had me thinking about my recent crib purchase. I thought "is our crib safe and if its not what the hell do I do with it". Well I was vexed for all of two minutes then I relaxed and said Bratt Decor has a reputation of being one of the best so I shouldn't fret.

About my crib . . . Bratt Decor implemented a Free Hardware for Life Campaign in 2008 that was created to help ensure the safety of every child with a Bratt Decor crib. Cribs are often assembled and reassembled multiple times, to accommodate more than one child, and cribs can be in continuous use for many years. When this happens, hardware can easily be lost and, as with any item, parts can simply wear out. Now, Bratt Decor will supply its clients with free replacement hardware for the life of any Bratt Decor crib produced after 2005.  

 

High Chairs

The presenter felt high chairs were basically spawns of the devil. He promoted feeding tables which of course is a product he was peddling.

 Check out this cool post from Ikea Hackers- they used products from Ikea and create a twin seat feeding table here.

 

Final products he highly recommends and was selling:

 The HALO® SleepSack® {need 2}

Breathable Bumper by Breathable Baby

Crib sheets that stretch

**Feeding Table by Baby Tenda

**Safety Crib by Baby Tenda

Baby Sense {crib respirator movement monitor}

 

**Baby Tenda Article

 

Take Home Lessons

 

  1. Baby Tenda is slick targeting first time parents.
  2. With every new purchase read the warning labels and check for product recalls
  3. Stationary cribs are best.
  4. Plastic parts made in China, Vietnam, or Thailand are not made with quality in mind. Choose steel and nails over plastic any day.

 

PRODUCT RECALLS

To keep up to date on current product recalls, make regular visits to the CPSC Recall pages, where you can also observe an insane pattern, as the same types of dangerous products get recalled over and over and over again. While you’re at it, you may as well also visit the FDA Recalls pages, where you can see the latest food and drug recalls. Here, you will also observe a similarly insane pattern, as the same types of dangerous products get recalled over and over and over again. ~Source

 

10 Things You Must Keep in a Fireproof Safe

One of my biggest fears is to lose everything I own in a fire. In an old LegalZoom Newsletter I received, an article by Sherry Ciurczak, titled 10 Things You Must Keep in a Fireproof Safe was presented. The information from is article is very important for everyone to consider.

 

In fact, the US Fire Administration estimates that fires nationwide caused more than $11 billion in property damage in 2007. Although 91% of Americans agree it's important to prepare for a disaster, only slightly more than half have taken steps to do so.

One great way to make sure you're prepared is to get a fireproof safe. What should you store it in? Here's a list of the top 10 suggested items to keep in your fireproof safe:

  1. Current insurance policies and agent contact information. You'll need this information right away if your house suffers damage in a fire.
  2. Your family's passports and original birth certificates. These can be a hassle to replace and will come in handy to establish your identity for other purposes.
  3. A list of your family's doctors, prescription medications, and contact information for all pharmacies you use. You may need these to get new supplies of medications you use on a regular basis.
  4. CDs or an external hard drive containing digital copies of all family photos.It's a good idea to scan all older family photos and keep a digital copy of them as well. Your family memories as preserved in photos are irreplaceable.
  5. Safety deposit box keys. If you store valuables at the bank, you'll want to make sure you can access them in the event of an emergency.
  6. Important papers related to investments, retirement plans, bank accounts, and associated contact information. You may need ready access to funds.
  7. Information on your outstanding debts, due dates, and contact information.It's important to keep tabs on your finances and protect your credit, even if you're displaced by a fire.
  8. Original Social Security cards. These can be difficult to replace and may be needed to establish eligibility for aid.
  9. Copies of your important legal documents, including powers of attorney, living wills, health care proxies—both for yourself and for anyone else for whom you are designated attorney-in-fact or health care surrogate. Having access to these can help ensure the protection they were created to provide.
  10. Copy of family wills and all wills in which you are designated the executor.It's important to safeguard wills so that loved ones are taken care of.

 

Article Taken from here